RELEASE DAY!
What a musician feels when it comes time to put our sweet babies into the world.
In all caps the text reads…
RELEASE DAY!
This is a message that Spencer and I share when either of us releases new music — he with Sego and me, up until now, with SWIMM. It is a text that simultaneously congratulates and translates the consistently underwhelming nature of the day upon which we release new music into the world.
The process — a crescendo of work and emotion — is what makes this day so underwhelming, of course — less blood, sweat, and tears, more doubt, spiraling, and self-loathing.
“Is the mix right?”
“Okay, the mix is there.”
“Did the mastering just ruin the mix?”
“What artwork perfectly illustrates the grandeur of this tune?”
“Should I just go back to college or learn how to weld?”
A crescendo of these tormentors until the day we put forth our precious creation.
THIS IS THE MOMENT! RELEASE DAY.
Kind of like Game Day for athletes, except there’s no Any Given Sunday speech—no Pacino in the locker room at halftime. You just post to social media, put your phone down, and stare off into the distance, pondering the root of narcissism, the meaning of life, and whether you could, in fact, earn enough supplemental income on OnlyFans to justify the possibility of family members seeing your schvantz on the internet. Magic and tumult to boot!
So now you know: when I release the next tune from my first solo endeavor—which will be a song called “Carry A Song With You”—I am sitting somewhere, likely alone, staring off into the distance—pondering. And, also know that I am thoroughly grateful for your messages on release day—as they stop all the pondering, if only for a moment. God knows the OF market is saturated!
Photo by Kosta Galanopolous at his home & studio in Eagle Rock, CA.